May I Take Your Order?
by TheSignsOfDeduction
Summary: Tony Stark is the CEO of Stark Industries. He is more than used to having people pander to him, but this one barista keeps misspelling his name in increasingly insulting ways.
1. Day One

Steve works the cash register during the morning shift at Starbucks, and this has its downsides. For one, the only people who come in this early are impatient students who you can just _tell_ got little to not sleep the previous hundred nights and uptight working adults who cannot stand not doing anything while waiting in line. At that moment, in front of Steve was a woman dressed in all black, from blazer to pencil skirt to pumps.

"Venti expresso Frappuccino," the lady said, looking momentarily up from her Blackberry to order.

"Coming right up. Name?" Steve asked.

"Sharon." She didn't even look up this time.

Steve gave a soft sigh of exasperation as he wrote her name on her cup, knowing full well this action would go unnoticed by her. He passed the receipt to her and she habitually took it and walked to the counter, somehow constantly occupied with something on her phone.

Steve smiled out of habit and opened his mouth to greet the next customer, but that customer was too engrossed in a phone conversation to pay any attention to the fact that Steve was waiting to take his order.

"Honestly, I could not care less that Hammer Tech is releasing new weapon-" The customer paused to listen before he interrupted the speaker on the other end. "Yes, _even_ if it is a week before the Stark Expo."

Steve cleared his throat.

The customer lifted his index finger to Steve.

"Sir, I'm going to have to request that you order, you're currently holding up the line."

"I am frankly insulted – Venti macchiato – that you think anything Hammer Tech does is going to affect the sale of my – of Stark Industries' weapons." The customer ordered mid-sentence.

"Name?" Steve asked, slightly forcefully.

"Tony Stark." Tony replied.

"Here you go," Steve said with a smirk, giving Tony his receipt. Tony didn't notice Steve's unusual behaviour, not that he would have cared, well, at least not until he saw (or heard) for himself the reason behind it.

Halfway through taking a customer's orders, Steve observed from the side of his eye that his co-worker was holding the Venti sized macchiato with a name very, very clearly and neatly written on it, and immediately looked at Tony. He wanted to see Tony's reaction.

"Tony Snark?" His co-worker called out. When there was no response, she asked again. "Is there a Tony Snark here who ordered a Venti macchiato?"

Tony's eyes narrowed, and Steve could just make out from Tony's lips that he had said something along the lines of "Let me call you back" before he slid the phone into his pocket. Tony walked to the counter with calculated strides and Steve bit his lip to stop himself from laughing.

"Here's your change, sir." Steve said, giving the customer his change in cash on top of a receipt.

"For future reference, the name is Stark." Tony had walked back to the start of the line, and his tone was both displeased and sarcastic. Without hesitation, Tony turned around and left Starbucks.


	2. Day Two

Tony Stark is back again, one hand still plastering that phone to his ear, and the other pushing the glass door open to enter the café. Steve rolls his eyes.

"Nat, you might need to man the other cash register for about five minutes."

"Seems like you got it well under control, Steve." Natasha replies, looking over her shoulder to look at the queue. "Besides, I'm kind of up to my elbows making drinks. We all are, given that speed you've been keeping up."

Steve laughed. "I hope that's not literal."

Before long, the queue steadily moved forward and although Steve usually paid full attention to the customer he was serving at the time, he couldn't help but eavesdrop a little on Tony's conversation, especially since it gradually and steadily got louder as he neared the front of the line.

And.. Then Tony Stark was at the front of the line.

"Welcome to Starbucks, may I take your order?" Steve asked, a polite smile on his face to mask the false enthusiasm in his tone.

"Pepper, two rehearsals is one too many. Three is just bordering on insanity. Venti macchiato. Yes, I _know-_ "

"Name, please." Steve had the one intention of annoying Tony Stark and he was having fun doing it.

Tony stared at Steve with dead eyes that betrayed an overwhelming irritation for a second before enunciating his name clearly.

"Stark. Tony _Stark_."

"Got it. Next."

Steve wrote very clearly – and deliberately – on a Venti-sized cup: "Spork, Tony Spork"

"Welcome to Starbucks, may I take your order?"

This time, the enthusiasm was real.

It didn't take very long for that cup to reach Tony Stark. (They prided themselves on efficiency at this outlet.) Nor was Tony's reaction anywhere remotely close to disappointing.

"Okay," Tony's gaze drifted down to Steve's chest for half a second, " _Steve_ , I can't be walking into my office – the office of the CEO of Stark Industries – with a cup that suggests that I am both a secret agent and a useless utensil. Here's my name card, get it right next time."

Without leaving any chance for a response from the blond barista, Tony left the café.

Without showing any sign of being bothered by that chiding, Steve moved on to the next customer with a smile on his face.

Soon, the queue dwindled down to a trickle and Steve and Natasha's morning shift was over.

"So," Natasha started as she packed her apron into her bag for later, "What name are you going to give your boyfriend tomorrow?"

Steve turned to face Natasha, who distinctly pretended not to notice the action.

"He's not my boyfriend." Steve said firmly.

"Not yet. I saw him give you his number." She smirked.

"That doesn't mean-"

"And I saw you put it away in your pocket." She raised an eyebrow at him suggestively.

Steve muttered a curse.

" _Language_." Natasha teased before she heading towards the door.

"That was _one_ time-"

"See you in twenty minutes!"

Steve rolled his eyes.


	3. Day Three

Natasha cleared her throat.

Steve looked up.

It was Tony Stark.

"Sod off." Steve said to Natasha.

"Another dollar in the curse jar." Her smirk was actually audible.

Steve didn't want to admit that he was actually looking forward to taking Tony's order. And even if he would, he was only looking forward to it because he thought of a really, really funny one. And that was the only reason, Steve was absolutely sure. So when Tony approached the cash register, Steve wanted Tony to know that he did not care. And as Tony approached the cash register, Tony said into his phone "I'll call you back".

"Good morning," Steve said simply.

"Morning, _Steve_." Wow, the sass was practically tangible. "Venti macchiato for Tony Stark." Tony said as he slid his Starbucks card to Steve.

"Coming right up, sir." Steve could barely hide his excitement.

He wrote Tony's name – or you know, a derivation of the name – onto a cup and passed it to Natasha, who immediately broke out in laughter.

By now the entire staff was in on the joke and they all couldn't resist sneaking peeks at the moment when Bruce called for Tony.

"Thorny Stalk?" He bit his lip.

Tony angled his head to one side and shot Steve a dirty look, and Steve, not shying away, smiled back.

"Here he comes," Natasha warned playfully. Natasha's eyes suddenly brightened with the glow of an idea. "I'll take over for a while. You have five minutes."

"Nat, I'm not going to-"

Natasha pushed him out of the way as Tony walked up to Steve.

"Very funny. I'm trying really hard to control my laughter right now." Tony said, his face completely devoid of humour.

"I try," Steve replied, an obviously false attempt at modesty.

"What does a guy have to do to get his name right at Starbucks? Perhaps a strongly worded letter of complaint to the manager?" Tony threatened.

"Ah, I'm sure he will understand, such things happen all the-"

"Really? Then I'm sure a letter wouldn't hu-"

"Try a date with a barista." The words came out before Steve thought through them, but you know, as long as the offer is out there..

"What?"

"You asked what you'd have to do."

Tony pursed his lips.

"You're the one with my number." Tony said implicitly and walked away.

"Called it," teased Natasha as she stepped aside for Steve to return to the cash register.

Steve let this one go. After all, he was the one who now had a hot date.


End file.
